Talking Marriage with Your Man

When is it okay to talk marriage with your man?

In my opinion...never. But that's just my opinion. You must be thinking, why? Well I'm old fashioned, traditional, even for my age. I don't believe in asking a guy out or asking him to marry me or anything that has to do with men and commitment. PERIOD. As many women must think "wow how old fashioned. Get with the program!" Yet those vary same women are having troubles with men and I didn't, like at all. In fact my man, who was far away from commitment as let's say the distance between the Sun and Pluto, asked me to marry him and within 2 months of just talking on the phone. I'm not lying. I was so surprised. I was like "really?" I said "maybe in a couple of years" and he said the same thing, but my initial thought was "why would you talk about marriage now? We haven't gone out, just once and it was at a starbucks for less than an hour." I didn't even know the guy. Yet he still asked me to marry him, why? Because I was different than any other girl he had seen. That's why. I wasn't moved by emotions or romanticism. That was the least of my worries or priorities. I wasn't concerned with guys in fact I was trying to run away from them. I didn't want to date and get involved with drama. As relationships, no matter how "perfect", involves drama whether it's between the two or outside people causing it.

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So I'm about to lecture women in general of what not to do in most if not almost all cases. If you two have been dating for less than a year or worse less than 6 months and expect him to pop the question, better think again. Unless, he has suggested it or has mentioned that he would love to marry you, or if you two have known each other before dating (friends), then it could happen. But, if you two were complete strangers then I wouldn't count on it. My case was different as I'm very peculiar and unique, as all Aquarians. Most women are moved by emotions and have no control of them, which is why men have trouble asking the big question.

If you two have been dating for quite a while(longer than a year) and don't live together then you have the highest possibility of being asked to marry him. Women who live with their significant other have trouble getting their men to pop the question. You know why? Why would he ask you if you guys live together and practically do everything a married couple does. He has sex with you whenever he wants or at least is at his disposible (an arm's reach), cooks, cleans, pay pills, works for him. *Not necessarily for him, but for the relationship*. You expect him to ask you to marry him? Really? You're basically his wife already but without the commitment. It's easier for him to dump you when he grows tired of you because like I said before, NO COMMITMENT. No messy paperwork, no lawyers, no assets being divided (unless you've been together for over 10 years*in some states*...too which I ask, why are you still with him?). The only chance you have of keeeping him is getting pregnant. Yup, kids make you do that...don't do it! Either two things can happen: #1 it could work out and maybe he just needed that little push or #2 he might bail and you get stuck with a kid without a father.

Either way you never push a man for marriage. Make him take the lead, make him ask. Many men are very traditional that way even though they do questionable acts. In the end a man wants to marry a woman he can trust, who is faithful, loyal, and lady. Be in control of your emotions. Keep living your life as if you were single, minus the cheating. He will see that you are different, and you are, it's just think about it. He grew up seeing his mom, possibly a yeller, arguing with daddy and taking away his independence. Then hearing his dad complaining about how awful mommy is. So he's traumatized. It's up to you to show what he's been missing a life without you by his side. Don't be like mother dearest.

So what have we learned? Do not push a guy to marry you, do not talk about it, to not mention it. It's okay to talk about it only if he does and in moderation. Why do I mean by that? Well just because he mentioned it once or it came up doesn't give you the right to drown him in marriage ideas or proposal ideas. GIve him some space. He'll come around and if he doesn't then maybe you should start looking elsewhere.

**Exceptions: Now this article is meant for the average man. There exceptions of course, like anything else in this world. There are some men who have NO problem with a woman stepping up and taking the role of the man. If your man is like that then it's okay. But I got to ask wouldn't you want a man to propose to you? Be the one who takes the lead and TRIES to be the dominator? (Like if men really are...lol.) It's up to you. You decide.

This is my relationship advice of the day. Take it or leave it. :)